Middle-aged artist sexual fulfillment foundation

Open on photo of CARL. Craggy looking face, receding hairline. That !@#$ lost little boy look in his eyes.

NARRATOR: (posh British accent O.S.) Carl is an artist. Carl is represented in some of the nation's finest museums, galleries and collections, but Carl is unhappy. He is goatlike and 45 years old. Carl is tired of his wife. His wife is tired of Carl. Sadly, other women don't like him. Well, young women.

Young women are Carl's inspiration. The reason he creates.

Won't you help?

You can. Some of you. If you're a young woman between the ages of 18 and 27, three weekends a month is all it takes. Simply submit to Carl's voracious sexual needs. Tell him he's a great artist. Listen to his tales of woe and take him seriously. The transformation will begin.

Carl will begin painting again. You are his muse, the light in his eyes. It takes so much and means so little. He might even paint you.

Operators are standing by.