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FALLING HOUSE KILLS DISPUTED LEADER MUNCHKIN COUNTY

MUNCHKIN CITY (OP). Nessarose, the acting ruler of Munchkin County, was killed by a falling house at a Munchkin political rally. Preliminary reports indicate Nessarose was addressing a crowd of Munchkins when she was killed by said falling house, a wooden structure of unknown origin. Death occurred at approximately 1:16 pm. today.

Nessarose's sudden death marks the end of a troubled political tenure, marred by bitter political disputes over the legitimacy of her authority. Nessarose was designated the “Wicked Witch of the East” by her political opponents, who have now seized power in Munchkin County. Accusations of foul play have immediately been voiced by Nessarose's surviving "Wicked" allies, who question the interim Munchkin County government's official account of Nessarose's death.

Details remain unclear. According to anonymous sources, Glinda (the self-designated “Good Witch of the North”), the chief representative of "Good" faction opposing the “Wicked” insurgency, appeared almost immediately following Nessarose's violent death, after which she addressed a young woman who had emerged from the unidentified wooden structure holding an animal of unknown species. Sources add that Elphaba (AKA “the Wicked Witch of the West”) appeared a few moments later and had a violent argument with the unidentified female and Glinda before disappearing. (Unconfirmed reports claim electrical discharge immediately before. A possible exchange of footwear was also reported, but this has also not been confirmed.) According to several witnesses, after conferring with Glinda, the unidentified female advanced along Yellow Brick Road in the direction of Emerald City. The "Wicked" insurgency made immediate claims of collusion and assassination plot between Glinda and the unknown female. "Good" faction continues to deny said claims.

Developing.

'Mr. Ed' -- what really happened

You know, I could do Wilbur selling Mr. Ed to the NIMH to investigate his brain and speaking abilities. But, damn it, Wilbur wouldn't do that. There's a basic loyalty between the man and his horse. Shit, it makes me want to cry.