Eagles

Marty Fugate Frodo: We have to get to Mordor, but the roads are all closed. What should we do???
Gandalf: Fly, you fools!
Gandalf falls.
Gandalf: I'm talking about the Eagles. For God's sake, don't walk to Mordor! That's suicide! Take the Eagles! The Eagles ...
Frodo: (leaning down) Would you mind repeating that?
Gandalf: (OS) The eaaaaggghhh …
Gimili: What did he just say?
Frodo: I dunno. Something about fried foods?
Gimli: I heard that.
Frodo: (sobbing) He always loved fried foods.
Gimli: No, no. The bit that came after that …
Aragorn: Ego, wasn’t it?
Gimli: What’s an ego?
Aragorn: I don’t know. It hasn’t been invented yet.
Frodo: (leaning down) Goodbye, Gandalf. (straightens up) Right then. I think we’d better start walking.
Gimli: No shit, hobbit. (to Aragorn) Which way is Mordor?
Aragorn makes a face, points up.
Gimli: Right then.
They begin the long painful climb.

EXT, MOUNTAIN PASS - DAY
Two Eagles waiting. One looks at his wristwatch.
Eagle #1: Where the hell are they?
Eagle #2: I don’t know. They were supposed to be here three hours ago.
Eagle #1: F***k it?
Eagle #2: F***k it.
They fly away.