The Bottom Line

ENRIGHT: I’m George Enright.

FRUM: I’m John Frum.

ENRIGHT: We’re here to talk about the economy.

FRUM: We’re economists. We have no other skills.

Dead air.

ENRIGHT: Well, talk about the economy.

FRUM: You first.

ENRIGHT: No, you.

FRUM: Christ, do we have to?

ENRIGHT: Yes.

FRUM: OK.

ENRIGHT: Ask me a question.

FRUM: OK. Do you think we’re sliding into a recession?

ENRIGHT: No. No, of course not. There’s no reason to. Unless we start thinking about a recession.

FRUM: Let’s not think that.

ENRIGHT: I wasn’t.

FRUM: Well, don’t,

ENRIGHT: That’s almost as bad as thinking about a depression.

FRUM: That’s unthinkable.

ENRIGHT: And it’s also depressing.

FRUM: Ah. So what you’re saying is--thoughts about a possible depression might have a negative affect on consumer confidence. Thereby creating a depression?

ENRIGHT: Yes. Even that thought has a negative effect

FRUM: You mean, thinking about the possible depression resulting from the negative effect on consumer confidence of thinking about the possibility of a depression might, in turn, reduce consumer confidence?

ENRIGHT: Yes. And also create a depression. Possibly. You forgot to mention that.

FRUM: The only thing we have to fear is fear itself?

ENRIGHT: Yes. We should be very afraid of the fear of fear itself.

FRUM: It could create a new depression.

ENRIGHT: Yes. Exactly. A new Great Depression.

FRUM: Even worse than the last one?

ENRIGHT: Much worse. A Greater Depression, so to speak. But not it’s not going to happen.

FRUM: Not if we keep thinking the right thoughts.

ENRIGHT: Happy thoughts.

FRUM: Good thoughts.

ENRIGHT: It’s a good day.

FRUM: It’s a very good day.

ENRIGHT: It’s not going to happen.

FRUM: No.

ENRIGHT: No depression.

FRUM: No depression.

ENRIGHT: I believe in fairies.

FRUM: I believe in fairies.

They clap desperately.