Death Goes on Strike

EXT, DIRTE BROTHERS FUNERAL HOME - DAY
Picket line of Grim Reapers holding hand-lettered protest signs.

UNGRATEFUL DEAD!!!
YOU DIE. WE SWEAT.
DON'T DROP DEAD!
LIFE'S A BITCH. DEATH IS WORSE.
WE GOT SOUL
LAST DAY. FAIR PAY,
R.I.P. U OWE ME!
DEATH GETS NO HOLIDAY

Newsman: It's a grim scene at the Dirte Brothers Funeral Home as a determined picket line from Grim Reapers Local #32 is blocking all attempts to send the dead to their final reward. The mood is angry, and they're happy to tell you why.

Reaper #1: Harvesting dead souls is a dead end job. We're paid next to nothing and Management expects us to be constantly on call.
Reaper #3: Try enjoying a vacation. Or a weekend!
Reaper #2: People are constantly dying! At ridiculous times!
Reaper #1: We demand dental care.
Reaper #2: And maternity leave!

Newsman: With souls unharvested, the dead remain undead. But, according to chief funeral director Stubborn Dirte, that's not their biggest problem.

INT, FUNERAL HOME -- EMBALMING ROOM
Stubborn Dirte is sitting on a coffin, which bumps and rocks like a mechanical bull as the occupant fights to get out. His brother and other employees are similarly occupied.

Stubborn Dirte: Yes, it's inconvenient. But it's not our biggest problem. Those ... things outside are ruining our image!
Newsman: In what sense?
Stubborn Dirte: We don't want our funeral home associated with death.
Newsman:  How ...

Shouts. (OS)

Newsman: There seems to be some kind of commotion outside!

Tracking shot, camera POV following Newsman as he runs outside to ..

Angry melee, they've grabbed a Reaper trying to get in.

Grim Reaper #3: Scab! We got a lousy rotten scab here!
Grim Reaper #1: Take the hood off!

Grim Reaper #2 yanks off hood. We see ..

A cute Day of the Dead sugar skeleton.

Grim Reaper #2: It's a Mexican! Lousy rotten Mexican trying to take our jobs!
Sugar Skeleton: I am only the caterer.
Grim Reaper #1: You lying bastard! Where's the food?
Sugar Skeleton: In the car! Let me go and ...

Screams. (OS)

Stubborn Dirte: (OS) Oh God, they're out ... they're .. No ... not my ... EAGGHHHHH.

Grim Reaper #1: Sounds like the Dirte Brothers got some unhappy customers.

Grim Reaper #2: You brought this on yourselves, people.

Sound: (OS) EAGHHHHHHH!

Newsman:  This is Jack Scat for Action News 7 ending the scene before I'm eaten alive.