Latin Americans

EXT, Parking Lot - Day
Roving reporter addresses camera.

Reporter: I'm standing outside Home Depot. The scene I see before me is repeated across this country. 

Camera pans to reveal ...

Toga-wearing Romans, lined up, waiting for jobs. The experienced old pros hold signs in English, the newcomers' signs are in Latin.

Reporter: Latin Americans. Willing to work. And willing to work for less. To some, it's an opportunity, to others a threat. 

A bearded Professor runs into the frame.

Professor: Of course it's a threat! Look at this toga party! You might as well call it Rome Depot!

Reporter: But why is that a threat to you?

Professor: Because ... it's not fair, is it? Just look at him!

Reporter: Who?

Professor: (pointing) Him! The smug creep with the leaves around his head. I'm an adjunct professor at a local community college. He's a philosopher and a master of rhetoric! How can I compete with that toga-wearing bastard? 

Reporter: You seem personally insulted.

Professor. I am! And he insulted me! He had the nerve to ask me what an "anacoluthon" was! I had no idea, but who cares? 

Roman: An anacolothon is an abrupt shift in the structure of a sentence indicating an interruption or different train of thought.

Professor: I teach impromptu public speaking, not ... go back to Rome! 

Roman: What is Rome?

Professor: You're bad for this country! 

Roman: But what is the good? 

Professor: Not you! 

Reporter: Economically, the threat is more than rhetorical. The impact on the local construction industry has been profound. 

INT, Developer's Trailer - Day

Developer: I wanted an aqueduct, OK? Every contractor I spoke to just laughed in my face. But these fellas rolled up their robes and got to work — man, they built me an aqueduct in less than a week! About a month later, I wanted a road. FDOT said it was impossible. These Romans said "Non forsit." They got 'er done! In days!

Reporter: And what about the sport of boxing?

INT, boxing ring arena. A Boxer stands in the corner.

Sound (OS) Ding!

The Boxer stands up. A Gladiator appears and runs him through.